Sunday, November 4, 2012

Kitsch-en Kounter: A Birthday Cake for Pop

In my mind I am an expert food stylist.  So lost in this delusion, I convince myself that I am capable of translating the perfect Gourmet Magazine-worthy spread of my imagination into something so awe inspiring that the primary reaction from friends and family will be a refusal to partake for fear of destroying its breathtaking beauty.  With every new culinary endeavor, I seem to forget that the centerfold spot in my imaginary food porn is far beyond my capabilities - especially when it comes to baking.

As is evidenced by all of my Kitsch-en Kounter baking projects - Peanut Butter Maple Cookies, Maraschino Cherry Cake, et. al - my reach falls pathetically short of my grasp, and I am left alone on the path to hell, paved entirely by my good intentions.  Nevertheless, when I get a "good idea" I hop right back up on the culinary horse and charge ahead.  Friday was my dad's birthday and to honor the occasion, I decided to make him a cake.  Cake for a birthday?  Will my ingenuity know no bounds?

Chocolate ganache
See how I try to get all artsy?  Trying for a still life and ending up with a big mess.

In considering the multitude of options, I remembered that my dad's childhood favorite was Neapolitan ice cream.  I think it was just his way of getting the most out of one scoop of ice cream.

That's my dad on the left (11-12 years old) and his childhood friend, John.
There is no denying that this kid liked his ice cream!

Feeling bold after the seven-layer cake with which we helped Charles Phoenix, I set about to create a Neapolitan birthday cake; three measly layers seemed absolutely entry-level.  Nevertheless, the grim shadow of my previous Kitsch-en Kounter encounter (Kitsch-en En-Kounter?) with creating a neapolitan dessert loomed over me as I started boiling, whisking, prepping, and mixing. I think my biggest hurdle is a supreme lack of confidence when it comes to baking.  Compound that by the fact that I had never before made a ganache (my bright idea for filling and frosting the cake).  Having seen it done 1,000 times on cooking shows, I had learned that one could transform a ganache into a frosting, simply by whipping it in a mixer.  I cleverly countered the voice in my head that said, "This is never going to work," with a brilliant, "Nuh-uh," and started ganache-ing.

White chocolate ganache frosting
Yes, despite it's mashed potato-y appearance, it is frosting -
  then why did nobody want to lick the spoon?!!


So, the plan was a bottom layer of chocolate cake with a chocolate ganache filling topped by a strawberry-flavored second layer/filling and a white cake on top, all frosted in white chocolate ganache frosting (I left the decorations to the muses).  The chocolate ganache turned out beautifully.  The white chocolate ganache?  Well...it looked like canned cream of chicken soup.  While it wasn't quite as chunky as that, its decidedly-soupy appearance left me unnerved because I had made twice as much to ensure that I would have plenty to frost the entire cake.  I wasn't sure if the fats in the cream and white chocolate were separating or if I had done something to anger the kitchen gods.  Since the degree I received from my correspondence course in food chemistry was clearly failing me, I almost sent someone for what is tantamount to a four-letter word in our house - a store-bought cake!!!  In the darkest moments, I found my only solace in the fact that no matter how awful the final product looked, it was bound to be pretty tasty.  Thankfully, after giving it ample time to meditate on its crimes against gastronomy in the refrigerator, the white chocolate ganache actually came together.  Whipping itself into a fluffy, spreadable frosting, it was absolutely delicious!

Having come to the conclusion that I had already pushed the breadth of my ambition to the limit, I used the
 remainder of the chocolate ganache to top the entire cake and abandoned the idea of any further decoration.
Whatever you do, don't let me near a piping bag!
 Amateurish?  Yes.  A runner up on Cake Wrecks?  Maybe.  Delicious?  Oh, yeah.
I decided to extend the color story of the interior to the top of the cake and I used pink candles.

The interior wasn't too shabby.
As one who usually swears off frosting/icing, I must say that ganache frosting
 is probably the best cake topping I have ever tasted.  As it is just as easy as any
other kind of frosting, I think it is the only way to go.

Then it was magic time!
We sing the regular birthday song but, following it up with a special,
family birthday song, guests are always left wondering how
long the candles will last.

As a rule, I try not to burden you with too much personal information on here.  When writing about my father, however, it is impossible to be anything but personal.  Five years ago, at the age of fifty-four, my dad suffered a massive stroke that left him totally incapacitated.  We put his life, and ours in turn, into the hands of medical professionals and held vigil night and day.  After a couple of months, our biggest celebration came when he was able to reach up and scratch his nose.  Two very trying years passed, both highlighted with successes and riddled with set backs.  We were finally hitting our stride when he suffered yet another stroke that erased the progress he made and left us all wondering if there were to be more birthdays for him.  

My inclination is to avoid reliving the those tension-filled days in my mind because I can remember the physical response I had to his prognosis; unable to train my mind to focus on anything other than overwhelming sadness, I couldn't sleep and I ached night and day.  For several days, we waited to see if the emergency procedures that were being performed on his behalf would have any positive impact.  Instructed to make peace and say our goodbyes, our family came together to face the most devastating outcome possible.  Then, sustained by IVs, a feeding tube, a ventilator, an arsenal of the latest in chemical engineering, prayers, and the love of our family, he began to rally!  

Three years later, many effects of the strokes are lasting- some seem like cruel jokes.  My dad was a talker; like Will Rogers, my dad never met a man he didn't like and with whom he didn't have at least seventeen things in common over which he could engage in a lengthy discourse (much to the chagrin of our mother).  His speech is now impacted by a syndrome called aphasia and communication is a challenge.  My dad was doer; as we dragged our feet behind him, he used every minute of his "free time" to improve our family home and to help neighbors, friends, and extended family.  My dad was a Renaissance man; after replacing the brakes on my car, you would just as likely find him painting, cooking, or writing a poem as you would find him installing a dishwasher.  He is now confined to a wheelchair and unable to perform some of the simplest functions of personal care.  My dad was an adventurer; as a young man he rode motorcycles and raced cars.  As a father, he made time to take us out of school for a day of fun at museums and parks.  He had the ability to make interminably long road trips seem like Sunday joy rides.  It is now our responsibility to convey him using a specialty van. 

In the wake of his illness and recovery, the biggest surprise is how little about him has changed.  Yes, he has become a little more fragile and a little more tender, but his brilliant mind is intact.  His sense of humor still has us rolling on the floor.  His passion for his wife (our mother) is abiding.  His love for his children and grandson is abounding.  His concern for others is unwavering.  His faith is steadfast.  His desire to be of service is unyielding.  His appreciation for beauty is strengthened.  His courage is undefeated.

It is interesting to see how his life was a lesson to which I should have been taking copious notes.  Since his strokes,  I have had to learn to be of greater service to others.  I have had to try to be more loving.  I have tried to embrace adventure.  I have had to rely on faith.  I've always been hilarious so that was not a problem.  Given the impossibly big shoes to fill, I have felt utterly inept on the best of days.  Fortunately, he is still here for reference!  It is my sincere honor to be of service to him and a true joy to celebrate his birthday.  Honestly, it seems like one giant, non-stop celebration around here; on top of the usual holidays and anniversaries, we get to celebrate both his birthday and his Stroke-iversary.

With a celebration such as this,
we could never forget his favorite ice cream!
Mr. Tiny and his Pop

Happy Birthday Pop!  We love you and are grateful that you stuck around.  Here's to many, many more birthday celebrations!

Until my next excursion into baking territory,
I'm saving you a slice!


Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

46 comments:

  1. I'm trying to type this through my tears. What a great tribute to your dad. I know you measure your blog success by the number of responses, but I don't care if there are none, your love and respect for your dad is success enough for this life and the life to come. You are an amazing and wonderful son!!

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    1. Mom, you're embarrassing me. My friends can see this.

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    2. Just kidding. Thanks Mom!!! I know your birthday is coming up too...are you just trying to butter me up to get a flattering post? LOVE YOU!!!!

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  2. I don't know how you do it!! First I'm having a great laugh about your baking adventure and by the end I am so pleased with the result that I want a piece. Then I'm on the brink of tears as you describe how wonderful your father is. I too know the joys of having a Renaissance father and the love and adoration a child can have for such a man. I also can understand the angst of trying to be just a tenth of who that man is. Your family is wonderful, courageous and obviously hilarious. Thank you for sharing such a personal moment with us!

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    1. Thanks Reagan! That is so kind of you to say. Like I said, I try not to get too personal on this blog but sometimes I can't help myself; my dad is pretty awesome! I know your folks must be pretty awesome too!

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  3. First, I loved that cake. It did NOT look like a failure - but incredibly delicious and just like its ice cream inspiration. Second, I resonated with your tribute to your dad. I loved the details about his personality - I could almost hear him in your words - and that photo of the two of you is priceless. My mom also suffered a stroke - not nearly as incapacitating - just a few years after I lost my dad to a massive heart attack. Seeing your parents decline can certainly rock your world and make you reevaluate what you value. Time takes on new meaning. I am so glad that you are able to pay tribute to your dad this way and to love him through it all. God bless you both!

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    1. Thanks Jamie! I am so sorry to hear about your mom and dad. Logically we know that everyone is susceptible to disease and eventually death, but it is hard to register when it actually happens. Your kind words have made my day!

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  4. Wow...the cake is amazing, but the tribute to your dad is really something. Yeah, I totally cried. Thanks for the reminder of the importance of family and the special place our parents hold in our lives.

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    1. Aw, thanks Lauren! Our family members become such fixtures in our lives that sometimes we lose sight of their importance and the lessons that they have to teach us. I'm so grateful that my dad continues to teach me everyday!

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  5. What a wonderful cake and a loving tribute for your dad. As strange as it may sound, given the struggles your family has faced, you are a fortunate man indeed. I didn't have a strong father figure and I envy you the force of nature your father is in your life. And no doubt he loved every bite of your amazing cake and ice cream. I'm sure he is incredibly proud of his son.

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    1. Thank you for saying that! One of the lessons that I failed to mention (probably because I continue struggle with it) is being grateful for everything that we have. Sometimes the biggest struggles yield the biggest rewards and sometimes you just have to count your blessing even when it seems like everyone has it better. Thanks again!

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  6. Replies
    1. Apparently there was an echo in my reply ;)

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    2. Hahahaha!!! Thank-ank-ank-ank You-ou-ou-ou!!!

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  7. What a beautiful post. Sometimes I wish the outcome with my dad was different and am jealous of the time you have with yours. I am happy for you and your whole family though. Although I know the last years have been hard I also know that serving the people you love is an honor. I guess we all learn that life is fragile and to enjoy the time we have. Your cake is beautiful...as is everything you make...but your love for your father is evident and inspiring! Thanks for this beautiful post!

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    1. Oh, zeeny, I so wish things had been different for you guys too!!! I just saw your mom and gave her a big hug! We always try to understand the "why" of things and forget that sometimes things are going to happen without an explanation that we can understand. My mom and I strongly believe that if we had been told that this was how things were going to end up, we would not have signed on. Then we realize how lucky we are and how much fun it is getting to know each other in a different way. It is still very tough, but my relationships with my dad is better than ever and the bond with my family has only deepened. THank you for taking time to comment! I hope you and your awesome family are doing well!!!

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    2. Thanks for hugging my mom! I so wish I could be closer and give her more hugs myself...maybe someday. I do have to stop myself from asking the "why" of things. I think in death my dad brought our family closer as well. I can only imagine how hard life has been but I also know how awesome your family is and that this has brought you together in ways most of us can't understand. So glad that you get to enjoy your dad...I will always remember his big smiles and his beautiful singing voice. Enjoy this time with him!

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  8. I laughed...I cried...I laughed some more. A bit like spending time with our family. Great post.

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    1. THANKS COUSIN BOBBI!!!!!! As long as I leave you laughing instead of crying, I've done my job. Gotta tear you down to build you back up. Miss you!

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  9. Happy, Happy Birthday to your Pop. I can tell that he's an amazing guy not only by your kind words about him but by what a great son he produced in you. Every square inch of that cake was composed with copious amounts of love and the desire to honor him and make him happy. That's a really beautiful thing - and in the end, your cake turned out soooo pretty! And wow, I didn't even know that they still made Neopolitan ice cream.

    My grandmother spent many of her final years with a stroke and though there was a lot of unfairness in the things that she couldn't do anymore, she still shone through. I'm glad that your Pop does too. Of course, as her family, we wished more than anything that we could undo it somehow but like you said, we were so happy to still have her with us. She taught me a lot of lessons when she was vibrant and mobile but some of the lessons that have helped me most in life are the ones that I learned from her as she adapted to the bolt out of the blue that was her stroke.

    God bless you and your Dad and your family. There's a lot to be said for love and devotion to family.

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    1. Thank Eartha! You are so kind! I hope I don't come across as too evolved about the whole situation; it is still very tough and, like you, I wish that we could just undo everything. The benefit though is that I have gotten to know my dad in an entirely new way and as a natural consequence we have forged an unbreakable bond. The lessons are always there, the challenge is finding out what they are! Thank you so much for your thoughtful words. I'm so glad that you had a chance to connect with your grandmother and learn from her!

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  10. wow, i don't think your cake looks like a candidate for cake wrecks at all! It looks great from the outside, and that triple layer inside is a stunner! i'm sure your dad loved it. and i hope he got to see what you wrote about him here because it is such a beautiful tribute. My grandfather had a stroke a few years ago and your story reminded me so much of him. He is an accountant and wasn't every going to retire and the stroke robbed him of most of his speech and his mobility, but he still has that sharp mind. Your dad is as lucky to have and you are to have him. I hope he had a wonderful birthday!

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    1. Thanks Rae! I really think he did have a great one. All his kids and his grandson (that cute nephew of mine) were around and he got to eat all kinds of junk that he normally doesn't get to eat - like neapolitan cake. Plus, my brother-in-law just got home after a year stationed in Guantanamo Bay! I'm sad that health issues are so prevalent, but it is nice to know that we are not alone in these situations. I hope your grandfather is doing well! As far as the cake goes, it did turn out better than I thought it would. I was about to throw in the towel several times. Thanks again!!!

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  11. Ok first off, your dad is awesome! I am so glad I have been able to meet him and I love hearing about him! I am sure he was impressed with your baking endeavors! Second, you are such a fab baker, I mean, who else would construct a pop rocks cake for Charles? I want to eat this cake through the computer screen!

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    1. Thanks Emily! You can't always tell, but he loves meeting people too; it is still such a huge part of his personality. I know he loved meeting you guys. Trust me you'll get a piece as this will not be the last of the neapolitan cakes; Mary already declared that it was to become a dessert staple!

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  12. Hi Chris, Deb, Mary and all the Simich's. What a great post to read! I loved your kitsch-en adventures and loved the tribute to your dad. We are lucky to have had you as friends for, let's see, 32 years now! I love you guys. Jan

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  13. P.S. Tell your dad hi! Jan

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  14. What a beautiful, well-written and touching post, Chris. Your dad sounds like an absolutely amazing man (and from meeting you and Mary, the awesomeness has most definitely been passed down through the family!) and I hope he had a wonderful day! As for the cake - it looks yummmmmmy! xx

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    1. Thanks Melanie! I guess my cake wasn't as bad as I thought it was...I should have made more! You are so nice to say those kind things! I try not to get too mushy, but I'm pretty sentimental.

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  15. The cake looks fantatic! What a wonderful post and tribute to your dad (made me misty-eyed), he sounds like a great man. I can totally see his sense of humor in that photo of the two of you together! How fortunate that even with all the struggles you're still able to have him in your lives. It's a reminder to us all to give thanks for the loved ones in our lives!

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    1. Thanks Tasha! I am always anxious that I an over-sharing on the blog, but it makes me happy that people can share in how cool my dad is and can relate it to someone they love too.

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  16. How inspiring, It a fantstic and thoughtful birthday surprise for you dad! The cake looks great, and I think im going to have to give ganache a try. I know exactly what your talking about in the kitchen... ever seen that episode of I love lucy where she makes bread? Yeah... my cooking is often times a lot like that... Job Well Done Mr. Tiny!

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    1. Definitely give ganache a go..it's actually pretty easy. I have seen every episode of "I Love Lucy" about 2,000 times - it is how I live my life; "What would Lucy do?" I've determined it is all about confidence. If I tell myself I can do it, then I CAN DO IT!!!

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  17. This is so sweet, Tiny! Thank you for sharing. Your pops is one special dude, and his love shines through your family!

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    1. Thanks P-Tab! He is pretty cool, huh? You are so sweet!

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  18. 1) I think the cake looks and undoubtedly IS delicious. 2)What a beautiful tribute to your dad. My eyes honestly welled up. I'm sure he's as lucky to have you guys (and that cake) as you are to have him.

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    1. 1) Thank you!
      2) Thank you! We are definitely very lucky!

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  19. Hi Chris,
    What a wonderful and beautiful tribute to your father. I'm not going to lie, but I had a lump in my throat and you're right when you mention that we can relate it to I love like my own father who is struggling with his own illness... I have never met your parents, but I know your siblings and you all are amazing, generous, and talented human beings and your folks should be very proud of all of you.

    All the best to you and your family!
    Jorge

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    1. Thank you so much Jorge! I really love writing this blog, but I never know what will resonate with people. I'm so happy that people can relate to my family and find themselves in some of the topics about which I write. I can't tell you how much I appreciate your generous comments and your constant support support of wacky tacky. I truly wish the best for you, your father, and your family. Thanks again!

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  20. Chris, you are so much like your wonderful folks! Remember that you are a truly unique individual with an exciting role to play in Life! love to all!

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    1. Thank you, Janet! That is actually something I really needed to hear right about now! Thank you for being an example of faith and kindness in my life!

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  21. I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, but I sure do admire his strength and yours to. Thanks for sharing this part of your life with us. I can definitely relate as my mother passed away about 5 years ago. She was such a kind and giving person; it didn’t seem fair at all that she would become so sick, and I still struggle with that from time to time. Keep faith, buddy. I ’ll be praying for you & your family.

    p.s: What a formidable cake you created! Consider me thoroughly impressed.

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    1. First, thanks for the cake compliment! Second, thank you for your thoughtful words. I am truly sorry to hear about your mom. I am lucky to have my dad immediately here with me but I believe you will always have your mom with you too. She sounds like a wonderful woman and an amazing mom! Thank you!

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  22. I had to make myself stop tearing up to be able to type this.... love this post! I wanted to express the pleasure of getting to know your dad while growing up. I remember when he came to install our playground, swing set and cement in our backyard in Costa Mesa. He also was there for my blessing AND my baptism, I have him in some of my photos, with his big dark red beard and sweet smile.

    He was so great, the Simiches are a family I will always hold near and dear to my heart! I'm sending this onto my dad because he especially had a connection with your dad back in the day.

    Jenny Ward

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    1. Thank you so much, Jenny. We have great memories of your family too. I'm glad that we can stay connected through facebook, etc. I will definitely share your kind words with my dad. Thanks again!!!

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