Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Kitsch-en Kounter: Tricky Dick's Irish Trifle

St. Patrick's Day always makes me wonder what the Irish think of our antics - the mad rush for corned beef brisket, the boiled cabbage, the marshmallows and instant pistachio pudding...  That's part of everyone's St. Paddy's dinner menu, right?  Well, it always is at our March 17 festivities.

Among the many other offerings that have little-to-nothing to do with genuine Irish cuisine, a healthy concoction of non-dairy whipped topping, pistachio pudding, crushed pineapple, and marshmallows that we so cleverly refer to as "Green Fluff" takes pride of place next to the dyed-green beverages and other obligatory St. Patrick's Day staples.

"Green Fluff"
While recipes vary, this is the basic ratio that we generally use:
1 - 8oz. tub of non-dairy whipped topping, 1- 10 oz. can of crushed pineapple,
1 - 3.4 oz. package of instant pistachio pudding mix, 1 1/2 Cups of mini marshmallows.
(In a stroke of further Irish fakery, I added some shredded coconut because I had a little left in the pantry)

In looking up information on the origins of this dessert (my grandmother was creative but with a blender absent from the necessary tools for this recipe, I knew it couldn't have been born of her imagination), I discovered that Green Fluff is an American creation of 1970's pedigree, better known by its era-appropriate moniker, "Watergate Salad" (leave it to our great nation to define something with negative nutritional value as a salad).

Kraft Foods lays claim to the creation of Watergate Salad but I like to believe the version of events that gives credit to a crafty sous-chef at Washington, D.C.'s own Watergate Hotel...yes, that Watergate Hotel.  Upon further investigation, I learned that there was also a recipe for a pistachio-pudding-based Watergate Cake.  As if Watergate Salad wasn't scandalous enough, my favorite one-liner about the cake is that it has "a cover-up frosting and is full of nuts."

Mmmmmm...green cake.
Much like the salad recipe, recipes for the cake have slight variations but are at their
core an easy combination of pre-made ingredients - cake mix, pudding mix, soda pop.
To unify the flavor profile, I added some drained, crushed pineapple to the mix.

wacky tacky is proud to remain politically-neutral on most occasions; as Richard Nixon's name generally elicits discussions of corruption and unsavory political practices, we thought it would be more fun to implicate him in the sweetness of our own culinary crimes.  Combining the frothiness of Watergate Salad with the green glory of Watergate Cake, we imbued our St. Patrick's Day dessert with the spirit of President Nixon (of Irish descent on both sides of his family) and created "Tricky Dick's Irish Trifle."

"Tricky Dick's Irish Trifle"
I am ever tempted to elevate kitschy recipes by upgrading ingredients (real
whipped cream, freshly-shelled pistachios, etc.) and implementing more
finesse.  It is then that I remember the old saying, "That would just be putting
lipstick on a pig."  And everyone knows, a fresh-faced pig is the purdiest pig.
Therefore, I just load on the inappropriate toppings like gummy lime wedges
and pearly-green Sixlets.

"I am not a crook!"
This kid can handle his scandal.
Once he deemed it edible, everyone
 dug into dessert with gusto!

Seriously, one taste of Tricky Dick's Irish Trifle and you'll be ready to chase the snakes out of the Emerald Isle, swim in a green river, exchange strands of plastic beads (since when was SPD reduced to Irish Mardi Gras?), and enjoy all of the other "traditional" activities for which St. Patrick's Day should be celebrated.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!!


Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

22 comments:

  1. Another masterpiece! Love the decorative garnish on top! My family’s Thanksgivings always had “Green Stuff” (a.k.a. “Watergate Salad”, a.k.a. your own “Green Fluff”) and my personal family favorite, “Pink Stuff” (We really got creative with the names, eh?). Another Jell-O concoction featuring strawberry Jell-O, pineapple, and cottage cheese. I was practically raised on it!

    Enjoy your St. Patrick’s Day festivities!

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    1. Thanks, Elisa! Mmmmm...now I've gotta have that pink dessert! Sometimes I pretend I'm too good for those weird potluck offerings but I really love them. Happy SPD!!!

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  2. This made me giggle - only American's would name something that contains marshmallows and Cool Whip, a 'salad'.... ;)

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    1. Hahaha!!! What, you mean I'm not on a diet when all I eat is "salad?" There is nothing so scandalous as our diets over here!

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  3. But for those in a hurry or lacking culinary skills, I understand Nixon's own White House lunch every [expletive deleted] day of the [unintelligible] week was cottage cheese with pineapple bits.

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    1. I knew I liked him....a fellow Orange Countian, a lover of cottage cheese with pineapple , AND a sweat-er of profuse proportions!!!

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  4. I can just see all my elderly southern aunts getting the vapors at the thought of this! It reminds me of ambrosia salad which is the only "salad" i know that features marshmallows as a key ingredient.

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    1. Isn't it frustrating when you're making your way through the buffet and when you get to salad bar you see the glaring absence of mini marshmallows?!?!! One of these days I must to go to a proper Southern potluck full of ham salads and ambrosia!

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  5. Too funny-we had a 'fun day' at work yesterday and I brought Watergate salad. I follow the recipe in the jello cookbook I have. It calls for the pistachio pudding, can of crushed pineapple, 1 cup of marshmallows, 1/2 cup of walnuts and 2 cups of cool whip. According to the recipe notes, it was originally called Pineapple-Pistachio Delight and was invented in the test kitchens when pistachio pudding first came out. And we have leftovers so I'll be having some for lunch today!

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    1. That is awesome! I'm sure you were the hit of the fun day potluck!!! We never added nuts to ours (that I remember), so I was surprised when I saw the online recipes call for them. I wonder why pistachios wouldn't be called for???

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  6. My first time seeing such things outside of retro cook book photos. Glorious!

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    1. Hahahaha!!! Thanks, Van! There has to be some way to make this a completely vegan dessert. With a vegan brother, we actually have a few vegan desserts in our arsenal but they are more delicious than "wacky tacky."

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  7. Looks like I'll be whipping up some Watergate salad this Monday! Heck we might even serve it at our big dance next Saturday! :)

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    1. Well, did you do it? I hope everyone liked it!

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  8. That truly is a kitsch recipe masterpiece! Im kind of upset I went high brown this year and made chocolate stout cupcakes with baileys cream cheese frosting

    retro rover

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    1. Thank you! I'll concede that yours sounds better but what I really want is BOTH!!!

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  9. I had a friend who, as a young man, used to make himself French Toast (egg/milk-dipped bread fried in butter) on Sunday nights. His family got in on it, coming into the kitchen and asking him to "make some for me too". This of course resulted in his being unable to enjoy his toast because he was too busy playing "short order chef" for everyone.So he solved the problem in a most typical way: adding FOOD COLOURING to the egg mix: green and blue. The family STOPPED asking him to make it for them, and so he was able to resume his "French toast night" ritual in peace, untroubled by "side orders".

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  10. Oh, and here's an "inside tidbit" about the Kennedy/Nixon election race: Apparently there was some finagling when it came to the TV debates; the camera that was on Kennedy had ONE kind of light filter and the Nixon cam had another: can't remember the exact formula but a photographer would know what it was: it was a matter of "red" and "blue" filters. Kennedy had the light filter that made him look GREAT and Nixon got the filter that made him look AWFUL. In addition, Kennedy was at ease on camera, and Nixon was extremely uneasy with them; thus not only did he LOOK like a weaselly used-car salesman in desperate need of a shave, he ACTED like one too!

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    1. I love the history! In some ways I feel downright sorry for ol' tricky Dick.

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  11. Mr Tiny did you know the Sewing Bee is in the states and they want male sewist? http://www.blogforbettersewing.com/2014/03/retro-makeup-giveaway-winner-sewing-bee.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+blogforbettersewing%2FrjQh+%28Gertie%27s+New+Blog+for+Better+Sewing%29 Check out Gerties latest Blog post.

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    1. That is so nice of you to think of me! Thanks for the heads up!

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