Sew What?! Santa Clarita Meets Santa Maria

Please stop me before I've gone too Chico's.  There is a fine line between bohemian/folky/ethnic chic and a full-blown Southwest nightmare - and I'm having to learn where to draw it.  Not that there is anything wrong with Chico's; it's only that Mary is just barely twenty-two and not quite ready to ride off into that great sunset of Santa Fe-senior sophistication.

Santa Maria in Mr. Tiny's Mexicali Folk Couture
Nevermind the blue wristband...check out those cool, cowgirl gauntlets!

This past weekend, Tiny & Mary were thrilled to be part of the annual Santa Clarita Cowboy Festival where we shared the stage with our pals Deke Dickerson and the rip-roarin'est kings of the Hollywood honky-tonk, The Lucky Stars.

File this under awkward family photos.
Dan, Mary, Tiny, Russ, Sage, Pappy, Andy, Djordje,
with Deke front and center...but where's Wally?!?!!

As the event landed within a few days of Mary's birth, she was definitely entitled to one new outfit, one that would hopefully work for our performance.  Ours was a daytime affair, so instead of going the rhinestones and fringe route, I opted for something a little more casual, a little more sultry, and a little more inspired by looks found south of the border.

Our little Santa Maria is still "on the fence" as to whether this looks
artistic or like the climax of an old-west melodrama.  Or maybe both?

In the steadily-reducing fabric stash at Mr. Tiny's Workshop, I discovered a remnant of multi-colored, woven fabric of indeterminate origin (my best guess is Peru).  The oddly shaped piece, garnered at an estate sale as part of a bin of fabric, had already been cut and used by its previous owner (a seamstress and lover of ethnic textiles); there was so little usable material left that I almost put it in the rag bag.  Mary rescued the remnant and it became the top of this two-piece entry into Mr. Tiny's Mexicali Folk Couture.

On the balcony with a balconette top.
I rather inappropriately think of those decorative accents at the neckline as
"eyebrows;" some perfunctory internet research indicated that tops of this nature
can be referred to as "balconettes."  Help me out here, vintage sewing pals???

Because I had only enough to barely eke out the bra-top, I began the hunt for fabric in a complimentary style.  I drove to nearly EVERY fabric store in the Western Hemisphere, even perusing the stalls at that lovable, little tourist-trap known as Olvera Street, to no avail.  I was not looking for a match.  In fact, I was happy with the idea of an altogether mismatched set.  Nothing I found, however, had the same weight, the same richness, nor the same quality as that damnable little scrap of fabric with which I began this whole mess...until I remembered that there was another, much larger, woven textile found in the same tub of fabric at the same estate sale, a piece I had looked at every day during my search but had tuned out because it was being used as a throw over a chair.

Using every last inch of the material, I gathered it into a long,
patio-style skirt, using solid black for the alternating tiers.

After the show, we went to explore the festival grounds, situated on the historic estate of William S. Hart.  The 1927 Spanish-Colonial mansion, the cactus, and the slowly-sinking sun were an ideal backdrop for a few photo-ops.

But maybe the sun had sunk a little too low for this picture...
Nevertheless, the view from the Hart mansion is 360-degrees of beautiful hill country.

Justifiably unsatisfied with my pitiful photography skills, Mary
set the auto-timer on her phone and captured this photo of herself.

As this was our first time at The Santa Clarita Cowboy Festival, we were unsure of exactly what to expect.  As it happens, the festival is a full family affair with activities for everyone.  Next year, I plan to make a long weekend out of it and listen to some of that cowboy poetry, hear a few more bands, rope 'n ride 'n wrangle, and get there well before all the barbecue is sold out!

Happy to finally be standing next to a real cowboy/frontiersman,
Santa Maria thought this guy was Jim Bowie, Davy Crockett, and
Buffalo Bill all rolled into one!

Well, what do you think?  Have I strayed too far into the land of metal lizards and copious amounts amber jewelry?  Are this ensemble and this guy haunting your desert dreams?  Fortunately, with this photo set, I think we're giving neither Chico's nor any of our photographer pals need to worry that were moving in on their territory!

Mr. Tiny & the wacky tacky adventure team say, "'Happy Trails,' until we meet again, Mr. Hart!!!"

"Happy Trails" - Roy Rogers & Dale Evans

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

wacky tacky Tunes: The Lucky Stars

Whether they accept it or not, every person in my family is musical; from drums to piano, guitar to saxophone, ukulele to cornet, accordion to singing and songwriting, music is in our bones.  When one of us finds a band or composition that we like (be it opera, Hawaiian, or Sousa March), it is a surefire guarantee that the rest of us will likely follow suit.  And while our musical tastes vary in the extreme, there is a collective memory and shared sentimentality that bind us musically.

An image of my maternal grandfather as a baby.
He rests on his father's knee alongside the guitar that
would inspire the musical future of his progeny.
(Oklahoma, approx. 1922-23)

Perhaps it is because our great-grandfather was an Okie guitar player (who according to family apochrypha, turned down an opportunity to play with the legendary Bob Wills), that one of our shared musical affinities is Western Swing and cowboy music.  As a native Californian of Yugoslavian descent who neither smokes, sleeps under starry skies, nor has ridden anything more bucking than a carousel bronco in the better part of three decades, I certainly make an unlikely cowboy.  Nevertheless, I know what I like and I love The Lucky Stars.  Needless to say, my whole family does too.

"Go To Town" - The Lucky Stars

Last weekend, in what can only be described as the best birthday present ever, Tiny & Mary were asked to open for The Lucky Stars at their "Go To Town" album-release party.  Fortunately, our pal, Kyle, of Ellison Studio photography was on hand to beautifully capture the moonlit magic as I was in much too much of a euphoric haze to even consider operating a camera.

Tiny & Mary
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

Accurately touted as "Hoolywood's full-bore, rompin', stompin' honky tonk outfit," The Lucky Stars are truly the best and most-accurate representation of honest-to-goodness Western Swing available today.  What makes them unparalleled, in our opinion, is their musical versatility.  With roots in punk, garage, rockabilly, jazz, and American vernacular music, and with a mastery of multiple instruments, members of the band bring a musical vocabulary so extensive and an ear so finely tuned that greatness is really the only option.

With guitarist, vocalist, and inimitable songwriter, Sage, at the reins,  The Lucky
Stars are definitely in good hands.  Wittily transforming Western story-telling into
a fine art via original tunes filled with the most clever lyrics, we've dubbed him
the Cole Porter of the prairie!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

Dan, Dan the Fiddle Man will effortlessly switch between fiddle
and horn and back again...sometimes within the same song!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

On drums and vocals, Pappy Stuckey always brings
the spirit of the old-timey greats to the bandstand!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

Standard or steel, Russ is at home on on any guitar!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

Wally might be able to hide in the shadow of his big bass fiddle but there
is no hiding the white-hot light of his playing under a proverbial bushel!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio)

With the flexibility of the best improvisationalists, The Lucky Stars will always make room
for guest stars.  It is a particular thrill when the guest instrumentalist just happens to be play-
ing the undisputed king of wacky tacky instruments - the accordion!!!
(photo courtesy of Ellison Studio) 

Committed to an authentic sound that keeps dancers on their feet, The Lucky Stars transition seamlessly between classic covers and incredible original tunes.  Perpetuating the art of Western music, it is a great pleasure to experience a band whose sole agenda is putting joy in every note and a smile on every face!

"All Shapes and Sizes" - The Lucky Stars

You don't have to be a cowboy (rhinestone or otherwise) to appreciate The Lucky Stars.  All you need is a working set of ears and toes that tap in time!  With multiple members in multiple bands, coordinating The Lucky Stars can be quite the feat.  Playing myriad festivals at home and abroad, if you see that they are playing in a honky tonk near you don't walk, run to see The Lucky Stars!   The first time and every time you see this band perform, you'll find yourself wanting more; be sure to order a copy of their latest and greatest, "Go To Town."

You will thank your "lucky stars" you did!
(Source)

While you're feeling thankful, we too must thank Kyle of Ellison Studio for sharing his lovely images and unmatched photography skills.  Riding pretty high on the thrill of playing with our musical heroes, Tiny & Mary are still thanking our own lucky stars for The Lucky Stars!

theluckystars.com

ellisonstudio.com

The Lucky Stars on Facebook

Ellison Studio Photography on Facebook

Tiny & Mary on Facebook

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

Flippin' Our Wig (Wam): The Charles Phoenix Wig Wam Pow Wow

Many times have we hailed the weird, roadside wonder of San Bernardino, CA's magnificent Wigwam Motel (est. 1949).  From road trip adventures, to birthday parties, to holiday wigwam lightings, we have become regulars amongst the teepee set.  Last weekend we were heap happy to attend the Charles Phoenix Wig Wam Pow Wow at what is quickly becoming our home away from home.

The whole lot was filled with classic cars, vintage trailers, and roadside enthusiasts.

We weren't there as spectators alone; we set up a pop-up hat shop in one of the Wigwam Motel rooms.

Charles, Mary, Zack, Fabian, and Mr. Tiny

After seeing some of the hats I had made for Mary, Charles kindly asked if I could bring
enough hats to sell.  Quarters inside the well-appointed wigwam were a little tight with all
of those hats but it made for a cozy (and blessedly active) selling space!

One of our pals, Cherie, was on hand and became one of the first people to
Put A Lid On It!  We were thrilled to see her (and her awesome, homemade Route
66 dress) before she leaves us for the more verdant environs of Portland, OR.

While I did take a break to dance along to some of my favorite tunes (ahem, "Mashed Potato Time") spun by the killer DJ, I spent most of the afternoon inside the wigwam hocking my wares.  Although, I have been assured that the event was chockablock with the most enjoyable activities, from showing off cars and trailers, to swimming, to weenie roasting, to s'mores toasting, to fireside sing-a-longs.

Two poolside fashion shows, hosted by Dave and Sabino of
Clever Vintage Clothing, were filled with spectacular ensembles.
They were even nice enough to include one of my sun hats!!! 

If I was a more ruthless kind of a person and capable of making a quick getaway, there were plenty of cars for which I would have gladly ditched all of those hats and started my life of crime - beginning with grand theft auto!

The cars were great but the real show-stopper was our friend's completely-
restored 1957 Airfloat trailer in gleaming gold!  I was so awestruck that
I only captured a peek through one of the porthole windows. 

Brian Potvin, the master "Ballusionist," created a
wigwam out of balloons and set it afloat in the pool!

The main event began at sundown; we were lucky enough to be a part of it!
Tiny & Mary opened the show for the incredible troupe from the Bob Baker 
Marionette Theater  and the always-enthralling Charles Phoenix Big Retro Slideshow!  

You might recognize some of those puppets from their big-screen 
appearance in Walt Disney's Escape to Witch Mountain (1975).

Escape to Witch Mountain (1975)

If you can't escape to Witch Mountain, be sure and make the escape to the Wigwam Motel - to sleep-ee and to peepee in a teepee are most underrated and completely unparalleled experiences!  We would be remiss if we failed to acknowledge the graciousness of the owner and conservator of this irreplaceable landmark, Kumar Patel.  He and his family have committed themselves to not just their own motel, not just their own city, but to the entire Route 66 community and to the lovers of all things wacky tacky!  A big thank you to our inimitable host and emcee, Charles, for including us in this very special celebration!

Wigwam Motel
2728 W Foothill Blvd
San Bernardino, CA
(909)875-3005

wigwammotel.com


Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

* The day has finally come!!!  Put A Lid On It Sun Hats are now available for purchase in our Etsy store, Mr. Tiny's South Side Market.  We will continue to bring you new designs, new colors, and new hat inspiration on a regular basis!!!

Crazy Crafty: Brown Baggin' It

There really isn't a word to describe the exact depths of indignity reached (for everyone involved) when a well-intentioned mother asks her ostensibly-mature, thirty-something-year-old son, "So, how are your puppets coming along?"  Such is the wacky tacky life I lead.

For better or worse, I think my parents resigned themselves long ago to the fact that my avocations would always skew toward the puerile, the sophomoric, the tragically-remedial.  Armed with no socially-acceptable excuse/explanation for my interests, all I can do is try to promulgate the unmitigated joy found in great literary volumes like More Paper Bag Puppets (1968).

The best thing about my thrift store find, More Paper 
Bag Puppets (besides 77% off of the list price), is the title;
"More" indicated the promise of a primary publication,
a tome of even more ideas for lunch-bag transformations,
a prequel that I can only assume is cleverly entitled
Paper Bag Puppets.

I happily bought the book but I couldn't shake the nagging
feeling that the sequel is never as as good as the original...

When I found More Paper Bag Puppets on the children's bookshelf at one of my regular, thrift shop stops,  I admit to being guilty of judging this book by its rather uninspired cover - BORING!  Except for the title's suggestion that its pages bore the great secrets of brown-paper puppetry, it is small wonder that it was still sitting on the shelf.  Upon breaking the binding, however, I discovered a wealth of late-60's line drawings.

I love these illustrations!
From goose to gander, wolf to granny, Jack to
giant, everyone in More Paper Bag Puppets
is giving the side eye.  

Given that each page was printed with the two-part face of a different character, my first thought was that the objective was to color the page, cut out the image, and adhere it to a paper bag.  Tut-tut...following that logic would result in the thoughtless sacrifice of one puppet per double-sided page; a quick glance back to the page of instructions (I HATE following instructions) revealed the proposition of a lengthy process including tracing the puppet face on transparent paper, transferring the image to "paper the quality of construction paper," coloring the bisected face, cutting it out, and pasting the pieces to the underside of a paper bag.  This book was from 1968; hadn't they ever heard of a mimeograph machine?!!

Trading one lengthy process for another, I decided that I would use the book's illustrations combined with the art direction for the opening titles of The Misadventures of Merlin Jones as inspiration for my puppets.

Putting a wacky tacky spin on the book's illustrations, I cut and layered colored papers,
starting with the violet-haired miss on the right.  After thinking of other big-haired
beauties, I set about creating a nod to Beetlejuice's Miss Argentina.  I knew that a trio
was in order so I made the cotton-candy bouffant-ed lady in the middle.
This was a great start but the real objective was a full-blown puppet production.
What was I supposed to do with this trio of overly-teased tresses?

The book was divided into sections that recommended intuitive dramatic play - a wolf, a granny, and a young, hooded girl were meant for enacting the perils of "Little Red Riding Hood."  Jack, his mother, and the giant lent themselves well to an all-paper-bag retelling of "Jack & The Beanstalk."  I wasn't sure what story to tell with my gals...the story that they told on their own seemed fairly unsavory.  I decided to clean up their image by making a sticky-sweet music video using a tune by the squeaky-clean McGuire Sisters.  It was "SUGARTIME!!!"

"Sugartime" - The McGuire Sisters

Can you tell that we're not professionals?

Our videos were shot using a very fancy, very borrowed camera but once I 

uploaded the videos to youtube, they lost some of their high-definition properties.

Feeling like I betrayed myself by investing so much time supporting the song-stylings of a different team of musical siblings, I realized that it was high time to add a couple more faces to our puppet repertory.

Tiny & Mary Puppets!!!
I made my cowboy hat removable so as to not be limited in future lunch-sack storytelling.
Tiny & Mary were just begging for a video of their own so I made a desert backdrop by painting and layering
large sheets of heavily-textured paper that have been in the stash for years - thanks hoarding tendencies!!!

Pay no attention to the smell of bologna sandwich and the leaky
Capri-Sun...we didn't know we were supposed to use new paper bags.

"Like A Stranger" - Tiny & Mary
(an original tune by Mr. Tiny)

Wouldn't you know it, just after production on our videos wrapped, I made a return trip to the thrift store.  Guess what I found.  Go ahead, guess!  Come on, just humor me and guess...

You guessed it, the original!!!
Paper Bag Puppets (1966)

Stay tuned...

A special thanks to our pal Fabian for filming, directing, editing, and producing our contribution to the history of puppet cinema.  Eat your heart out, Muppets!!!

Have you ever ventured into the world of paper-bag puppetry?  I must be honest, it is actually much harder than it looks (and I'm afraid we made it look pretty difficult).  Do you think you've outgrown your homemade-puppet faze or have we inspired you to start crafting?  Would you be interested in a personalized, paper-bag portrait of your very own?  Imagine being immortalized in craft paper!!!

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

Bowl-O-Rama: Wagon Wheel Bowling

Much time has passed since we last brought you a Bowl-O-Rama feature; the reason being that we had visited so many beautiful, old, local alleys that it seemed we'd begun to exhaust our natural resources.  With just split seconds left before the wacky tacky fracking for bowling alleys began, we remembered a rich deposit of Bowl-O-Rama that was just waiting for our greedy exploitation at Wagon Wheel Bowling (est. 1953) in Oxnard, CA.

Alright, alright, the facade of Wagon Wheel Bowling is about as unprepossessing as
it gets, but do you really doubt our abilities to bring you the best in Bowl-O-Rama?
That multi-colored thumbprint glass alone was worth a little look-see.  

A landmark of a certain stretch on the 101 Freeway (of which I made mental note on countless childhood road trips), my backseat view of Wagon Wheel Bowling always elicited scenes of trail-weary pioneers so thankful to have reached the land of plenty that the only fitting expression of gratitude for their salvation was thirty-two gleaming lanes and tricolor shoes in every size!  However, it was never my fate to explore the realities of this minivan daydream.  In an axiom-shattering example of the early bird failing to get the worm, we always passed the Wagon Wheel long before the lights were switched on; by the time it was open for business we were already begrudgingly giving hugs to relatives in the northern reaches of the state.

One of the greatest things about Wagon Wheel Bowling is that it's the lone
survivor of Wagon Wheel Junction (a complex of offices, a restaurant, a motel,
and the eponymous bowling alley).  Fortunately the incredible, neon-stagecoach
sign for the demolished restaurant and motel still stands; in an era of rampant
"bulldozery," we hope that it continues to take pride of place along the freeway
or at least finds a good home! 

This trip to the bowling alley was no exception to our typical time-table folly; we arrived at Wagon Wheel hours before opening.  Pledging to come back during business hours, we took the opportunity to capture the bowling alley's gorgeous sign by daylight.

The details of this incredible, double-sided sign include the bent arrow, the ball and pin, the sign-painter
script, the faded turquoise-and-red color story, and that bold, bowling font all highlighted by glorious neon!!!

Well, we made good on our promise.
How's that for form and follow-through??!!

While there were absolutely no bonneted pioneer women tending to cast-iron cauldrons over a campfire, nor wagon trains, nor trail masters, Wagon Wheel Bowling provided all the comforts and charms that a mid-century bowling alley ought to offer.

We were thrilled to find an intact western motif (one of our favorites) and original fixtures - interior
shed roofs, old championship rosters, shingle signs, and of course, wagon wheel light fixtures.

The bar/billiard room/banquet hall came complete with vintage furnishings, a quaint brick-and-flagstone
fireplace and the queen of all pinball machines, Elvira!  Erika schooled us on how not to win at pinball...

Like any bowling alley worth its salt, Wagon Wheel Bowling is home to a coffee shop;
the current occupant is Doña Rosa's Mexican Food.  We had just eaten but that didn't
stop Ben & Erika from getting cozy in one of the original, naugahyde booths.  Wouldn't
it be a dream to have a space like this to make into a wacky tacky diner?

Mr. Tiny makes like a wagon wheel with the Wagon Wheel sign.

The Wagon Wheel holds a special place in our hearts because one of Tiny & Mary's signature tunes (an original) is titled "Wagon Wheel."  I can't say with absolute certainty but, having the sign stamped in my subconscious after so many road trip sightings, it is safe to say Wagon Wheel Bowling may have very well been the inspiration for the song.

"Wagon Wheel" - Tiny & Mary

(Filmed by our pal James)

Just like that old wagon wheel, we'll keep rolling along looking for the next Bowl-O-Rama.  Do you know of any beautiful bowling alleys that we simply must visit?  Have you ever been to Wagon Wheel Bowling?  Did you ever eat at the restaurant or stay a night in the motel?  Our high score at Wagon Wheel Bowling was just exploring its history but we want to know, what was your record bowling score?

Wagon Wheel Bowling
2801 Wagon Wheel Rd
Oxnard, CA
(805)485-4915

wagonwheelbowling.com


Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

Saving Mr. Tiny: A Story of "Summer Magic"

It is never my intention to use this blog as a platform from which to boast.  There are, however, precious few moments in my life that are truly worthy of proud celebration and 2013 shouldn't come to a close before I acknowledge one of the best days of my life.

The combination of an amazing Christmas present and a recent screening of the film Saving Mr. Banks reminded me that I have been remiss in expressing my gratitude for an opportunity that, even months later, I still have a hard time believing to be real.  In the summer of this year we were invited to the 85th birthday party of none other than Richard Sherman!

Did I mention that it was a surprise party?

Held at the incredible home of our friends, the party included Disneyland's Main Street
silhouette cutter, Mary Poppins tribute art, a sing-along with the birthday boy, and
a custom "Golden Record" cake of one of Mr. Sherman's classic songs.

For those who might be unfamiliar with that name, Richard Sherman is half of one of the most dynamic, prolific, and influential songwriting duos in history - The Sherman Brothers.  If you're still not sure of the name, think "You're Sixteen, " "Let's Get Together," practically every song ever sung by Annette Funicello, The Jungle Book, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Winnie the Pooh, and of course, Mary Poppins.

The Sherman Brothers were not only instrumental in the scoring of Mary Poppins,
they played a huge role in securing the film rites and making sure the film was made.
My favorite scene in Saving Mr. Banks is when "The Boys" win over the tyrannical
Mrs. Travers with the cleverness of their lyrics and the unadulterated joy of their music.

I have it straight from the source that Mr. Sherman
approved of Jason Schwartzman's stellar performance.

Attending the party would have been honor enough, but Tiny & Mary were also asked to perform!  Can you imagine the thrill and the terror of singing a great songwriter's work for the composer himself?  Putting fears aside (well mostly, I might have choked up a bit as I explained how much his music meant in our lives), we performed what has become Tiny & Mary's theme song, "On the Front Porch" (written by the Shermans for Walt Disney's Summer Magic).  We also sang the "Doll On a Music Box/Truly Scrumptious" duet from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.  As it turns out, the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang duet is Richard Sherman's favorite piece from the Sherman catalog and "On the Front Porch," his brother Robert's favorite.

Elizabeth & Richard Sherman listening to Tiny & Mary
sing - MAGICAL!!!  Unbelievably gracious, Mr. Sherman
thanked us for our performance and didn't even quibble
over the fact that we were singing "On the Front Porch" on
the back porch.  He even remembered us when we had the
opportunity to sing for him again at another party.
(photo by our talented pal, Jimmy Mulligan - thanks Jimmy!)

Someone recently told me that my life looks like one epic adventure after another.  When I am cleaning bathrooms, changing diapers, driving my dad around in his transport van, scouring the oven, and feeling like I haven't a friend in the world, the concept of "adventure" seems a complete mystery to me.  Like everyone else, my life is filled with the daily mundanities that make for terribly-weak blog fodder - until these precious adventures and gifts are bestowed upon me.

Speaking of gifts, the "amazing Christmas present" that I alluded to earlier was a vintage
film poster from Walt Diney's Summer Magic.  We agreed not to exchange gifts this year but
my brother and his wife decided not only to give gifts but to make those gifts incredibly
thoughtful and generous!

I am so appreciative of the musical genius of The Sherman Brothers; nearly every happy, childhood memory I have is underscored by the charm of their brilliant compositions.  I am incredibly grateful for wonderful friends and family members that save Mr. Tiny by gifting me with their love and generosity.  Singing for Mr. Sherman is definitely a gift that keeps on giving.  When, on a cold winter day, I am chilled by the depths of my own ingratitude, I remind myself of that blissful hour and the warm memory of interacting with a man who continues to delight people the world over by sharing his talent and allowing others to do the same - talk about your "Summer Magic!"

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

Nippon Nuptials: Nami Getting Married

If there is one thing that the Japanese get right - and let's face it, they get just about everything right - it is weddings.  As I have mentioned, our latest adventure to the Far East was prompted by the nuptials of our Japanese sister, Nami, and our new brother-in-law, Masa.  And, boy howdy, did they have an incredible wedding!  With a preemptive, if altogether token, apology to my married friends, I must say that Nami and Masa's wedding was the best to which I have ever been witness.  

Unfamiliar with any part of the Japanese wedding ritual, we were beyond excited for some rich cultural immersion.  Graciously provided with a chauffeur/wedding guide/translator in the form of Nami's friend and co-worker, Kasumi, Mary and I were granted the once-in-a-lifetime privilege of seeing Nami get married in a solemn and wonderfully-traditional ceremony.

Mary with Erina (far left) and Kasumi (far right) at the pre-ceremony tea.
Unfortunately, I can't remember the name of the charming woman in the center.

The wedding - ceremony and reception - was held in a posh hotel in the heart of Kokura, Japan; it was the kind of swanky affair to which, under normal circumstances, we would surely never be invited.  Taking a few moments to observe, I saw that wedding guests were checking in at a reception desk and provided with a program that detailed the history of the bride and groom as well as the seating arrangements and a ticket for the pre-ceremony tea service.  Mildly overwhelmed and woefully inept at understanding Japanese, we were beyond grateful to have Kasumi and our new pal, Erina, to explain the protocol.  Following the tea, guests were directed to a covered patio in the hotel's massive gardens for the ceremony.  Kasumi instructed us to take a seat near the aisle so we could get a good glimpse of Nami as she entered; I know, it seems like something we could have figured out on our own but I had to laugh at myself because, honestly, without her instruction, what probably should have been obvious, was incredibly useful to these novices.

THE CEREMONY

The groom awaits his bride.

For a few moments we sat and marveled at the brilliance of the gardens when a swell of traditional Japanese music indicated that we ought look behind us to see the bride's grand entrance.  Well, despite having been given the best instruction to get an aisle seat, we were surprised to see no one at all.  With just the faintest panic that we had a runaway bride on our hands, we turned back toward the garden and saw a giant, red, paper parasol in the distance.  Nami wasn't coming down any lame aisle; as her father led the way and her mother held her hand, Nami was traversing the rocks and bridges of the gardens with her eldest brother holding the parasol.  Let me tell you, I was a basket case.  I am an unabashed crybaby but this was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen!

Nami was an absolute vision.
So used to seeing the twenty-year-old, tomboyish surfer that
lived with us many years ago, we were blown away by her transformation
into such an elegant woman - and that did nothing to stop the waterworks.

This is the officiant.
His job duties included not only directing the exchange of vows, rings, etc., he was
also responsible for inviting God's presence to the ceremony, skillfully playing the
flute, and shaking this incredible pompom.  Serious duties to be sure but...

 Let's just take a minute to get a bit of a close up on his fiendishly
 spit-polished platform shoes, why don't we?
I guess when invoking the presence of the Almighty,
one must reach a little closer to the heavens.

I can't fully express how much I loved the ceremony.
Because I couldn't understand any of the language, the allure of the exotic was
definitely a factor.  However, I really did appreciate all of the ritualistic aspects; the
ceremony was long enough to let us know that something actually happened.

Showing off the wedding bands.

Instead of throwing rice, or blowing bubbles, or releasing balloons, butterflies, doves or any number of other releasable objects, the tradition at a Japanese wedding is to shower the couple with a scattering of origami cranes - a symbol of good luck.  As soon as we arrived we got right to work, helping to fold as many cranes as we could before the big day.

Even though this image is blurry, it is my favorite from the wedding.
Raised separately by different parents in completely different countries and cultures,
I couldn't help but feel a particular, fraternal pride in my Japanese sister as she and her
new husband beamed.  They just radiate with joy! 

THE RECEPTION

Upon entering the ballroom (Mary and I got a sneak preview), I was immediately struck by how familiar it all seemed.  Large round tables, floral centerpieces, place cards, candles - it could have easily been any wedding anywhere in the world.

Having both spent time in Southern California, the bride and groom
 dedicated each table to the different cities they had visited while in the US.

The ceiling was covered by huge, cherry-blossom chandeliers and the seats were filled with gift bags!

And then there was the eight-foot-tall wedding cake!!!

The setting appeared lovely, if somewhat expected, but that was the end of any expectations being met.  Continuing the solemnity established by ceremony, the reception maintained a formal tone...good thing I wore my tux...

Why did everyone at the wedding think that Mr. Tiny was a waiter?

The food was unbelievable (not that I really ate any of it).
I think Japanese people must have an infuriating combination of high metabolism and hollow legs;
seemingly insatiable as course after course was delivered to the table, they ate it all!!
I told everyone at our table that at an American wedding, we would be lucky to get a salad, a dinner roll, an
entree, and a piece of cake.  Not only was the food incredibly plentiful, it was all about artful presentation.

Presented in a bamboo wishing well, the piece de resistance was the sashimi course.
After serving the tray, the server told us to wait until she filled the well with magical
 liquid from a magical vessel; it became obvious that the magical liquid was water
when dry-ice fog billowed out from under the sashimi.   

The bride and groom were announced and Nami's new outfit and dramatically-coiffed hair indicated that the production - complete with lighting and music cues, retracting walls and ceiling, slickly-produced videos, spotlights, costume changes, and musical numbers - was about to begin.

Mr. & Mrs. & Tiny & Mary

Over the course of the evening, Nami changed four times.
Each change required new hair and make up as well.
This tiered bouffant, festooned with flawless, fresh flowers,
was my absolute favorite!

Get a load of that cake!!!
The secret is that the cake is a fake!

There was, however, a very real cake.
The wedding coincided with Nami's father's birthday
 and there was a birthday cake to honor him.

The evening continued with yet another costume change.  This time instead of walking through the doors, the entire wall was raised for the newlywed's entrance.

To a soundtrack of Disney songs, the couple made their way from table to table lighting a candle.
For this portion of the evening Nami wore a romantic, Western-style gown.

Tiny & Mary dedicated a tune to the new Mr. & Mrs.

After all, what adds more romance to any occasion than a brother-sister duo...

Ours was not to be the only performance.  Beyond Tiny & Mary, there was plenty of music at the reception but a complete absence of dancing.  I will freely admit that dancing is usually my favorite part of any wedding.  I will also admit that I am not a big fan of the first dance, father-daughter/mother-son dance, or my least favorite of all, the money dance; they just take a lot of time before I am allowed to get out on the floor.

Normally, I would be disappointed by the lack of getting groovy but the Japanese wedding reception, marked by tearful speeches, heartfelt letters written by brides to their parents, and dramatic rituals, sets such a dignified tone that doing the Macarena would feel downright unseemly.  And then this happened...

Apparently, it is quite the fashion to have friends relieve the decorum with a choreographed, cross-dressing, musical presentation.  It was funny...and very strange; I guess they have an ardent appreciation for wacky tacky!

After the reception, we had a chance to meet the parents!

The reception ended but the fun was just beginning.  All the young single adults were invited to an after party at the hotel's cafe.

THE AFTER PARTY

The after party is where the happy couple indulged in some Western wedding
traditions including feeding each other cake.  The kiss has no place in the
traditional Japanese ceremony and no amount of glass clinking at the
reception will elicit a smooch.  Nevertheless, the after party guests demanded
some PDA.

The Japanese even find a way to make the bouquet toss more safe and refined;
instead of an over-the-shoulder toss to a group of blood-thirsty women, the
participants each take a ribbon; the ribbons are tugged and the person
holding the ribbon that is still attached to the bouquet wins!   

Even at the after party there was no dancing!  Although, there were plenty
of games, gag gifts, and inexplicable Mickey Mouse Jack-O-Lanterns.

The funniest part was watching a video only to surprised by a photo of the
 long-ago Halloween when our family dressed up as the cast of Hairspray (the original)
with Mr. Tiny as Mr. Pinky and Nami as Motormouth Maybelle.

This post might have lasted longer than the entire wedding but I never know when to leave the party...and this was a great party!

Congratulations Nami and Masa!!!  Thank you for a wonderful trip and an amazing wedding!  We wish you a lifetime of love, happiness, and wacky tacky!!!

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny