Kitsch-en Kounter: O Krisp-mas Tree, O Krisp-mas Tree

Am I on Pinterest?  Yes.  Am I positive that I understand the intended purpose of Pinterest?  Not so much.  At face value, I think it is an ingenious way to electronically organize and store useful bits of information that would otherwise clog my years-old, unbacked-up hard drive and/or perpetuate that archaic process of tearing pages out of magazines.  In action, I see that it is just another way of wasting time online while simultaneously making me feel equal parts self-important and hopelessly inadequate.  Inadequate not simply because it is hard to imagine living up to the professional-quality photos of clever crafters lit beautifully by perfectly-diffused afternoon sunlight, rather because I am pinning neither as often nor as well as I should.  Seriously, you don't want to be inside my head when I launch into a neurotic inner-monologue about how I don't have enough pins, how the pins I do have aren't cool enough, and how I can't re-pin other people's pins because then I would just look like a dirty copycat.  It is entirely possible that I have problems much greater than Pinterest.

My biggest issue with Pinterest is that it proves the saying, "There is nothing new under the sun."  When struck with the "best idea in the whole wide world," I have been known to check Pinterest to make sure that mine is a wholly original one.  Inevitably, I learn that the pancake layer-cake has been done far earlier and far better than I could ever do.  After so many Pinterest-induced disappointments, I abandoned this practice - much like I had abandoned so many of my "original" ideas.  Just because somebody somewhere else in the world had come up with the same brilliant idea didn't mean that I hadn't experienced my own brush with brilliance, right?  Two bolts of lightning can strike distant points on a map without diminishing the electrifying brilliance of each other, am I right?

Brilliance often begins with Rice Krispies (or puffed rice, or "Crispy Rice" cereal
product, or whatever generic label suits your fancy).  It just so happens that the
real deal was on sale and less expensive than the store brand - Christmas miracle!  

It is always a challenge at holiday time to come up with something to take to the never-ending series of potlucks.  On a side note: the occasional potluck can be a real kick but what ever happened to throwing a party and just allowing your guests to be guests?  Call me old-fashioned, but sometimes I want to just show up at a party without having to bring the entire party with me (hostess gift, hors d'oeuvres, white elephant gift, ornament for the ornament exchange, two-dozen cookies, and ugly Christmas sweater).  In many ways, I am such a control freak that the thought of someone bringing something unexpected to a party I had so carefully planned would be enough to send me into a tailspin.  Like I said, my issues extend far beyond Pinterest and potlucks!

Charged with bringing "something to share" to a holiday party this year, I knew I needed a dish that would be easy, that would travel well, and that would bring a spark of seasonal drama to the heavy-laden buffet table.  I needed to make something that would snap, crackle, and - dare I say it - pop!  With Rice Krispies at the ready and a pantry full of staples like mini-marshmallows and green food coloring, I started farming my very own Rice Krisp-mas Tree!

Nestled on a bed of newly-driven coconut snow, the Rice Krisp-mas Tree
 is adorned with cinnamon candies and dusted with powdered sugar.  Designed
to be a pull-apart finger food, the tree felt like it was missing something... 

I almost forgot the topper, a Krisp-mas star!

Although, the real star of this show is probably the chenille-stem,
spun head snowman and his cheery, cherry-red top hat!

Just like a real one, even the most perfect tree on the lot needs a bit of trimming after it survives the ride home on the roof of the car.  After trimming the excess away from the graduated layers, notching out the branches, and several rounds of sampling , there were still more than a few scraps.

Ignoring the admonition to not play with my food, some of the scraps
turned into the perfect pretzel-shaped Krisp-mas mask for Santa!

Even if there are already 1,000 similar examples, there will be room for one more Rice Krisp-mas Tree on Pinterest by the time this post is published!  Hopefully it will have everyone singing, "O Krisp-mas Tree."

"O Christmas Tree (O Tannenbaum)" - Vince Guaraldi Trio

Be sure to check out Mr. Tiny's Pinterest page for other Kitsch-en Kounter ideas and to feel good about how superior your pinning is!  What are you taking to your holiday potlucks this year?


Cheers!

Mr. Tiny

Crazy Crafty: Gettin' Christmas Crafty

I am normally not a crafter.  I don't have the patience, the time, the skill, or the money (crafts are EXPENSIVE) to make something that is set on a shelf and/or put away in a cupboard never to be seen again.  Don't misunderstand, I appreciate the skills of you serious crafters out there.  To be perfectly honest, I think it is out of pure, unadulterated jealousy at the nimbleness of your fingers and your never-ending ingenuity, that leaves me at odds with crafts.  Having said that, when the crafting bug bites, I bite right back - generally biting off far more than I can chew.

We live near a little plot of land that is a bastion of unachievable perfection in the world of horticulture/landscaping, namely Roger's Gardens.  For decades it has been, as A Christmas Story so beautifully puts it, a "yearly bacchanalia of peace on Earth and good will to men" - at least for the Martha Stewart set.  We try to go at Christmas time every year because the gardens are transformed into as much of a winter wonderland as Southern California can offer; stately pines end up being more lights than needles, an abundance of Christmas decorations of all sorts are available, and Santa Claus is there. A couple of years ago, while sidling through the crowds and outcroppings of merchandise, I found some tabletop, tinsel trees with beaded garlands and miniature ornaments.  In my eyes they had the primitive quality of mid-century Christmas decorations and all the sparkle of wacky tacky.  I turned one over to check the price tag and nearly had my first heart attack when I saw that this puny, little, ten-inch bit of Chinese manufacture was fifty dollars!  Before my friends could be embarrassed by the volume at which I shouted, "Fifty Dollars?!!  I could make this," I was at the 99 Cents Only Store sourcing materials for my trees.

My trees - not perfect but they get the point across
It took me two years to get them made; I told you, I'm not a crafter.
The total cost per tree is less than three dollars!
I guess that last sentence could have gone without saying...

As fate would have it, we were out doing some thrifting the other day and what did I spy, but one of those selfsame, coronary-inducing trees from Roger's Gardens.  At 96 percent off of the original price, we strapped it to the roof of the wacky wagon and brought it home.

The inspiration for my 99 Cents Store specials.
It's kind of like a glittering version of the Charlie Brown tree.
I wish there were more; I still love them!

The evidence is there, I am just not much of a crafter.  At least my trees are kind of funny and are entirely commensurate with the style guidelines of wacky tacky, right?

Have you been doing any wacky tacky Christmas crafting this year?

Roger's Gardens

2301 San Joaquin Hills Rd

Corona del Mar, CA

(949)640-5800

www.rogersgardens.com

Cheers!

Mr. Tiny