Monday, August 4, 2014

Kitsch-en Kounter: We Have a Wiener (Dog)!!!

As proven by our Mexican Corn Dogs (a questionable take on tamales), it is nigh impossible to improve on the perfection of the classic corn dog.  Nevertheless, in all of my foolhardiness, I keep on trying.

Last weekend I was invited to an "Edible Atrocities" potluck birthday party where each guest was asked to bring a dish inspired by the kooky culinary traditions of 20th-Century American cookery.  Instead of referencing my shelf of vintage cookbooks, I decided to explore that well-known black hole of bizarre ideas, my own brain.  The very last thing in the world that I like to do is waste food; I knew I had to make something that was both bizarre and, hopefully, crowd-pleasing.  What's more crowd-pleasing than corn dogs?

What's more edible than that all-American pantry staple, Jiffy Cornbread Mix?
 "Quality and Value since 1930!" 

And what's more atrocious than CHEESY WEENIES?!?!!
"Nutrition facts:" none.

After considering the options for a corn dog casserole, it was clear that a 9x13" pan was not going to cut the mustard.  It is oft said that we eat with our eyes first; shape is always important and a circle is always appealing - think donut, burger, cookies, pizza, all the best foods.

I realized that I had pans brownie, cake, springform, angel food, loaf, glass, non-stick, etc.  The one gaping hole in my pan-theon of baking pans was a one with a gaping hole; I needed a ring/bundt-type pan.  A quick trip to the thrift store on half-price day was the answer to my kitsch-en kounter prayers - a steel steal at 50¢!

It was at this moment that I considered the possibility that I might have
overfilled the pan.  Instead of panicking, I just gave myself a pat on the
back for putting everything on a lined cookie sheet!

After a bit of clean-up and cooling time, this corn dog creation was nearly award ready.
Next stop, the "Wiener's Circle!!!"

Of course, a simple ring was a little too tame for the type of party people that this savory corn cake was going to feed.  The "edible" box had been ticked, it was time to tackle "atrocious."  The corn-dog casserole needed a puppy personality and the obvious direction was dachshund, a wiener-dog wiener dog!!!

Using golden potatoes and black olives, I made a simple dog face that
ended up reminding me more than a little bit of Gromit

Atop a bed of curly parsley, chasing its roasted-potato tail on potato-wedge feet around
a bowl of honey-mustard glaze, this Golden Wiener Ring pup was prepped to party!

While the Golden Cheesy Weenie Ring is not necessarily what I would hold up as a "Kitsch-en Kounter" best, I feel fortunate that failure really wasn't an option when "atrocity" was the desired outcome.  The only real failure was that, at the last minute, with the Golden Wiener Dog on the leash and ready to go, some silly circumstances precluded my attendance at the party.  Talk about wasting food - I wasn't about to eat this junk!!!  Hahaha!!!

Well, who wants leftovers?  Do you like corn dogs?  Have you ever experimented with crazy mid-century recipes?  Have you been brave enough to eat the results?


Mr. Tiny


  1. I kind of love every little thing about this. It basically covers all my basic food groups: Hot dogs, carbs, and honey mustard...AND THERE IS A POTATO DOG! This is what I imagine jesus serves in heaven.

    1. Thanks, Kimmie! I'm almost positive that this was the main course at the last supper! If you look closely at da vinci's painting, you can see corn bread crumbs and cheesy weenies.

  2. OMG, this is too hilarious. You have the right kind of imagination that makes me smile. Thanks for brightening my day!

    1. Right back at you! Thanks for stopping by!!!

  3. That's actually a really awesome idea and I will probably attempt to make it, because well, i love corn dogs and doxies! My great grandmothers best friend shared a recipe that has been handed down for generations. Aunt Smitty's Salad. It's a jello mold recipe that will be dying with this generation. check it out! lol

    1. Okay, before I looked up the recipe, I thought to myself, "Maybe this is the next 'Kitsch-en Kounter' recipe." And the I looked it up...cabbage, cauliflower, and lemon Jell-O?!??!!! No thank you! If you do try the Golden Cheesy Weenie Ring, please be sure to let me know how it turns out...and how much cuter yours is; I know you've got kitchen skills!!!! Thanks!

  4. it's so beautiful! i DO Love corndogs, but you never find vegan ones. the batter usually has eggs. i haven't have one in a few years!

    did you taste your creation at all? I'm dying to know what it was like! i LOVE the little head and how it's curled around the honey mustard. a culinary triumph!

    1. Thanks, Rae! Yeah, with Jiffy mix you must add milk and eggs. I only had coconut milk so I used that and it worked okay...maybe coconut milk and egg substitute??

      I'm a fraud! After missing the party, I just wasn't in the mood to try it!